Divorce Mediation

What Is Divorce Mediation?

Divorce mediation is a process in which a divorcing couple works with a mediator to find agreement on divorce issues, such as assets, parenting time and child support. A mediator will help you talk through these issues and give you and your spouse ideas along the way. 

Does the mediator try to get the couple to get back together?

No. This is not marriage counseling. The mediator does not try to promote reconciliation.

Do I have to sit in the same room with my spouse?
 
That is up to you and your spouse. Mediation often works better and faster when the couple is in the same room. However, sometimes, especially in cases of domestic abuse, it works better to have the couple in separate rooms.

How long are the mediation sessions?

You will mediate long enough to get something accomplished, but not so long that you get warn out.  Most mediation sessions are two hour blocks once a week until an agreement is reached.  However, if you choose to have your lawyer present, the mediation sessoin will likely last until an agreement is reached.  With attorneys present, mediation sessions can last anywhere from a couple of hours to all day.

Do I need to have an attorney when I mediate?

No.  But remember, a mediator is not your personal attorney and cannot give you legal advice. Some couples hire lawyers and the lawyers attend mediation with them. Some couples mediate without their lawyers present.

Is Mediation Cheaper than Going to Court?

A couple that successfully mediates their divorce can save thousands of dollars by avoiding a trial.

Is Mediation Faster than Going to Court?

The court system is slow and ti can take months to get through the court system.  A successful mediation can be done in much less time.

Could I get a better agreement if I go to court?
 
You are ‘throwing the dice’ if you go to court.  There’s a chance that you might come out happy, but there is also an equal chance that you will come out feeling upset that the judge didn’t understand what you were trying to say.

Can Mediation Help Improve Communication with my spouse?

There’s a good chance that it can.  If you have children, you will still have to communicate with each other. Sometimes talking through issues with someone else in the room can help a couple learn how to talk to each other more civilly.

Does the judge find out what is said in mediation?

No. Mediation is a confidential process. No one knows what is said in mediation except the two of you, the mediator and your lawyers.

What if I don’t like mediation?

Mediation is voluntary and if you don’t like it, you can walk out of the room. If you don’t like how things are going, you can quit.

What if I am not married to the other parent of my child?

If you have parenting and support issues, you can resolve them in mediation, even if you were never married.

By: Herbert Kroon